You sit down. You want to say something. Nothing comes out. You wonder if that says something about you. It doesn’t.
Not knowing what to talk about is common in therapy. It happens outside therapy too. You pause. You check in with yourself. You wait for something real to show up. That’s a sign you’re paying attention.
Here’s why it’s okay.
You don’t need a script
Many people think therapy needs a clear topic. It doesn’t. You don’t have to arrive with a list. Your mind doesn’t work in neat bullet points. Some weeks feel heavy. Some weeks feel blank. Both tell a story.
Silence is information
Quiet moments can feel awkward. They also help you listen to yourself.
You might notice tension in your shoulders. A thought you pushed aside. A feeling that’s hard to name. Silence gives space for those things to surface.
You’re still doing the work
The work isn’t only the talking. It’s the showing up. It’s noticing that you feel stuck. It’s paying attention to what comes up when nothing comes up.
Ask yourself:
- What’s been on your mind even for a second this week?
- What have you avoided thinking about?
- What would you say if you didn’t worry about saying the wrong thing?
These small openings often lead to the real stuff.
You don’t need to perform
Some people worry they need to “use the time well.” But therapy isn’t a performance. You don’t need to sound interesting or clever. You don’t need to impress anyone.
Your therapist isn’t waiting for perfect sentences. They’re waiting for you.
Your mind protects you
Sometimes the mind goes blank when something feels too close. Not knowing what to talk about can be a defence. It gives you time to feel safe. When you’re ready, things come forward.
You can start anywhere
If you ever feel stuck, try starting with something simple:
- How you felt walking into the room
- Something small that annoyed you
- A moment that made you smile
- A question you keep returning to
- How it feels to not know what to say
The smallest thread often leads to something that matters.
It’s a sign you’re human
Everyone gets stuck. Everyone hesitates. Everyone has days where words don’t come. You aren’t broken. You aren’t failing.
You’re human. And you’re allowed to arrive exactly as you are.
What’s one thing you noticed in yourself while reading this?
